I need help in stretching my letter in Eng 102 into 1 1/2 page. This is only one page.?
My name is Rebecca Allen. I am born into Near the Water and born for the Mexican People. My maternal grandfathers are Red Running Into the Water People and my paternal grandfathers are Coyote Pass. I reside in Tsaile, Arizona, where I have lived all my life with my family. My hobbies are rug weaving, sewing clothes, and playing piano. I am 21 years old and am currently going to school at Dine College.
First of all, I am writing this letter to request for a scholarship fund consituated for college students. I need help in paying for my tuition. Whatever amound the capter house helps me with will be fine. The money you give to me will be for my tuition and some of my school supplies. It will help me in getting closer to paying my whole tuition which is one- thousand and five-hundred dollars.
Secondly, this is my second semester at Dine College and I am going to college to earn my degree in Liberal Arts.
The other half is writen on another question page.
My first suggestion is to use the spell checker and grammar checker tools in a word-processing application.
In order to expand this essay, include more details – but only details that are relevant to the subject of this essay. Is the purpose of the essay to describe yourself, or to request money? That’s not clear from what you have written so far. State the main purpose in the first paragraph.
Give some explanation and details about what you will do with the money, and why you need it in the first place. I don’t mean stating just that the money will go toward tuition and supplies, but how will these contributions help you achieve your goals? I assume your goals go beyond just attending college. Do you want a Liberal Arts degree so that you’ll have a well-rounded education so as to better understand the human condition? What do you want to do with your education?
If the point of this essay is to tell us about yourself, tell us more about your home and your family. You mention your tribal affiliations, but as a non-Native American, I have no frame of reference. Describe more of the culture. Basically, clean up your spelling and grammar, clarify your points, and provide details.
Good luck! I admire you for pursuing a college education and wish you all the success in the world!
Hammock Shop USA – Spring Showcase 2010
